A Confession....Prayer Request

I am just going to lay something out here that has been heavy on my heart for a while now...I hope I am not judged, but I have to just say it and get it off my chest...or chesticles as Demi and Nikaya call them..hehe

I am in the process of looking for a job.
After quiting as an Adoption Coordinator I am only helping a few families on the side by answering questions etc...getting to do what I feel I am called to do, but not having to put up with agency bull while doing it. :-)
Unfortunately, it, along with the general economy now, has put us in financial straights. Not that I was making major $$...about $250-$300 a month with the agencies I worked with, but it helped.
We have added 2 kids and growing 2 others who have been home for a while, it has been tight.
We have debt, like many do, but I have one debt that makes me ill to owe....Our adoption fees of one child. I was able to work it out to pay little amounts on what we owed to get the kids home. I still owe quite a bit to Dr. B and feel sick about it. I know that he is so financially strapped that he NEEDS that money more than I do, but I have none to provide. We had big hopes of taxes, economy stimulus, promise of help from others etc.. but all panned out to be way less than expected, did not happen or had to go to other things when they were here.
He has asked a couple of times where we are in order to pay, and to have to tell him I do not have it makes me more than physically ill. He has never said anything to make me feel bad about it, other than I KNOW his position in Haiti etc.

Please, if you feel led to pray for the situation, pass on any job leads you hear in the adoption world etc I would really appreciate it...otherwise, it is just great to get it off my chest to someone other than the Lord and hope that if he hears it from more than me he will help me find a way to remedy the situation.