Thursday, January 17, 2008

My Pity

Lately I have been feeling very down. Things have been rough with Haitian Adoption, new law changing, making it harder for families to adopt. Changing agencies and having not even gotten the chance to meet my new group has been frustrating.
I feel like I am trying to prove who I am, what I can do, what I know and not getting very far with it. The frustration has been enormous for me and for that I ask for Prayer.

There have been a few days that I have felt like bagging it all and just substitute teaching at the kids school whenever I could..just to have a 'normal job'. I get frustrated that I am frustrated because to me, it isn't a job, but a calling that I have answered.

The other day, while feeling particularly down I received my W2 in the mail for taxes. I am not ashamed to say it in public, but I made a whopping $5200 for the entire year of work. Now, THAT had me depressed as I looked at my phone bill (now getting better due to changing to Internet phone) and all the other bills I have incurred doing my work. The stress I feel, the time it takes away from my family doing it and the openness I have allowed myself with my Adoptive Families.
Then, in my pity I dug thru the mail and found a card. This card was from Tim, Beki, Jamie and Gracie. To open a card and read what they had said, the included photo, the smiles on their faces and to be a family finally...it made it all worth while. The happiness I saw on the families face was one thing, but to see a little girl, finally home...healthy...knowing that she is eating ALL she wants and is kissed ALL she wants and more...made it ALL worth while.

I walked to the fridge and looked at the faces of the kids that I have seen come home.....more than 50 kids...and the families I have helped unite....more than 37...and my pity began to disappear.
To all my families that read this, past, present and hopefully future. For the friends that I have made while 'working' and friendships that I hope will last a lifetime.
THANK YOU!

2 comments:

Amy said...

No, thank YOU! It is usually the most worthy of professions that get paid the least. Think of yourself, teachers, police, firefighters, etc. Those that serve the most, receive the least monetarily, but hopefully the gratification of their work far supercedes the money. I've been a teacher and an adoption worker and it IS worth it! You have families like mine as fruit of your efforts.
WE LOVE YOU!!!

Love,
the BROWNELL FAMILY =)

Angela said...

Yowza...over 50 children?? If only God could use me to touch lives the way YOU do!! That's so wonderful!!! Just think... 50 kids grow up get married, have kids who grow up and get married and have kids who grow up and get married... See where I'm going with this? Your efforts will have played a part in the lives of so many from here until when Jesus comes back. Your efforts and life has LITTERALLY changed the world forever (insert cheesy movie where you wish you were never born and then see how different it would be if that were true). Seriously.. the impact you have on others is HUGE and not just the families that you were an agent for..... both through support and friendship I have no doubt you've touched countless lives. You've been quite priceless to me for sure!

Much love,
Angela